#ThursThreads – “Eez Fatez, Yez?” #flashfiction

#ThursThreads is an odd flash fiction compo, because a line chosen from the previous winner is chosen as the prompt for the next competition. This week, the phrase “Do I get a head start?” is it.

Here is my entry, if you don’t want to see the original piece:

“Eez Fatez, Yez?”
by Dr. Mike Reddy (@doctormikereddy)
[250 words]

The visitor entered the Gypsy Tent, sat down and blurted to the veiled partition “How do I get a head start? I mean with my life. I just can’t seem to get a break.” he continued hesitantly. “Is… anyone here?”

A manicured hand parted the curtain, and waved a small brass crank until the man reluctantly took it. “Zis is a cranial crank, young manz…” came a voice dripping with European mystery. “Plaze in ze left ear to ztart your brain. Yez? And in ze right ear to ztop eet. Yez?”

“Are you seriously expecting me to…”

“Eez an ‘ed ztart you ver vanting, yez?” the hand gave a thumbs up then withdrew behind the veil. “Left to Ztart. Right to ztop. Five dollarz on ze table, yez?”

“I don’t understand. When I say ‘head start’ I’m not sure it’s meant literally. It’s a metaphor.”

“Ees metaforz, yez. Take. Take! Five dollarz.” the hand reappeared and pointed forcefully at the dish on the table. “Five dollarz pliz! Will helpz, yez.”

“Er… yez?” the man deposited five bucks in the dish and left. On his way out he stuck the handle in his left ear and gave it a comic twist. He laughed, then thought better of it and dropped the brass crank on the table, but left the money. “Zee geepzee had been worth zat mooch” he chuckled to himself as he left.

“And zo eet beginz…” the voice whispered. “At leezt not chooz rightz. we have eenuff Republeekanz, yez!”

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